Six months is half a year, but it will go by fast! I made the final decision a few weeks ago I will not extend my service for an extra year--which I was in fact considering--and will leave Zambia for good in April of next year.
What has been going on in my mind since my decision is pictures are forming of home in my mind. I think about home more and more as the days go by. I have no idea what I will do when I get home as far as work is concerned, but I am not going to worry about that right now. I just want to come home.
I still have many things I want to do before I leave Zambia. I'm not finished here, yet. As a procrastinator, I do my best work at the end. I thrive under pressure. Kind of like a race; I get the adrenaline rush again that helps me push hard to do the best I can to finish.
One thing that has been on my mind lately is my health. It is not the way it was before I left for service. I was running several miles per week, ate fairly healthy (an awesome high power smoothie every morning), had healthy relations with family and friends, went hiking and spent alone time in the forest...I haven't done any of this since I've been here. In fact, I started a vice which I won't disclose publicly, but promise myself to discontinue when I leave here.
I want to run races again. I want to run with my friends. I want to go hiking. I want to spend time alone on the top of a mountain somewhere.
Alone. I have not been alone, except in my hut, since I've been in Zambia. There is literally nowhere to go where I can be alone. There is no solitude. Solitude for me back home was something I needed weekly. If I didn't get it, I would get cranky.
Living in a fishbowl, being stared at constantly, and even when hiding in my hut I'd hear "Ginny" over and over until I come out I am sure has taken a toll on me in some way.
But, when I come home, I think one of the first things I will do is climb a mountain just to be alone. I will sit and listen to the birds and watch the clouds roll by. This is what I need in my life. Solitude.