First Several Months in the Peace Corps as a Slightly Older Volunteer

     I’m under 50, but, I’ve gone through divorce, raised kids, been in the work force over 20 years, and put myself through college. Not only have I brought two bags of luggage weighing under 100lbs for two years of service, but heavier baggage from the life I’ve left behind. Taking a plunge into serving in a third world country as the oldest woman of my intake, I was aware I may be facing a challenge the others in my intake will not face—isolation due to age gap.

Pre-service Training

     Since arriving in Zambia seven months ago I’ve met the people I would spend three months with during pre-service training. Out of 27 there was a small handful of others in their early to mid-30s. Everyone else in their 20’s, just like my oldest son. I had a choice: do I put on the mother ‘hat’ and make sure they understand I’m older, fool them into thinking in control of my life and I’ll be a rock for them?

Absolutely not!

     I came in just like they did: unsure, nervous, little scared leaving everything behind. I didn’t know any of these people before I left except for a few brief conversations on Facebook. So how could I continue carrying on with my role as a guiding force as I had done many years before? Well, I decided that I am going to do this Peace Corps thing as a person with no age attached to me. Like I mentioned before, my entire adult life has been as a mother; albeit, not always responsible, made many mistakes, and carrying some guilt; so here I am…on my own for the first time as an adult…with a bunch of awesome people just out of college.

    Shedding my age, but hanging onto the knowledge I’ve gained over the years, helped me through. I formed great friendships with some of my intake. Others stayed more or less acquaintances, but we all respect each other and we will always be there to support each other during our service and maybe beyond. Something I learned from a few Volunteers: they were excited to get to know me. There were also a few who acknowledged admiration of my determination to make my dream reality becoming a Peace Corps Volunteer.

My Intake

     My intake group was full of interesting and intelligent adults. That’s how I saw them. I would even feel I wasn’t as smart as some of them. A little humbling, but I moved through it. I remember learning from my own kids over the years. I’m not a know-it-all and never want to be. So I made sure I was open to others’ ideas. There was also a lot of humor; some of it I thought absurd, such as, another Volunteer blew up a condom on his head until it popped. I look back on it now and laugh.

Language

     I struggled through the language and found those few who I would sneak into a corner with and discuss how we felt being the ‘slow’ ones in our language groups. It was nice having that support. I needed it more than anything. There were times when I thought I wasn’t going to make it through because of the difficulty I had. But I continued and I’m glad I didn’t give up.

Host Family

     I loved living with my host family during training. I had read in a forum of 50 and over adult Volunteers discussing being ‘older’ and disliking being told when they will eat, what they will eat, and when they will take a bath. I looked at this situation as: wow, I’m being taken care of and I like this. I took full advantage of the structure set by my family. I did choose to continue washing my own laundry even though I did a terrible job at it.

Back Home

     I left two children behind: one nineteen and the other 27. My 27 year old is settled with a career in teaching and doing well. My younger son is in a different situation. I tried guiding him in a certain direction before I left, but he got derailed a few times while my being in Africa. We communicate through Facebook and texts. I have been long-distance parenting and somehow it seems to be working. As long as I’m there for him, we are both ok.

     I made a pact with myself once I left the United States to serve: I will not allow anyone influence the way I conduct myself while living two years in Africa. That means no romantic ties back home. I am free, like I said, for the first time in my adult life and looking forward to the person who is waiting to arise from within. Having limited support from home is quite a challenge, though.

Community Entry

     When I entered community entry I found myself having difficulty transitioning to the isolation of being sole Volunteer for several kilometers. I felt like I lost my identity. No one was there to confirm who I was.

     Living thousands of miles from home in a country with different culture including food, language, dress, norms, and mores, no one really knew me and no one really understood what I was going through; except other Volunteers. The Volunteers in my intake I was close with lived in other provinces, so I felt around my own province for new support.

     I immediately got support from other Volunteers. I had my first visitor to my site; I visited another Volunteer for a few days. This turned things around for me. I learned that others were having similar struggles and I got ideas how to handle certain situations. I started to learn how to live on my own in my community.

     Community entry was tough. My strength within has grown immensely during those three months.

Post Community Entry

     I made it through community entry and am now creating work for myself to help my village with food security. I have been making new contacts with NGOs, friends nearby who are villagers and missionaries and I’m continuously meeting fascinating people. I still face struggles, but I seem to be able to deal with them better. One of the things is having a strong support system from other Volunteers. The Volunteers in my province are my family; my family here in Zambia, Africa…in the middle of nowhere.

     The point I’m getting at is when older Volunteers enter the Peace Corps, letting go of past roles, such as in a career, or as a parent; being open to other people’s ideas and not being judgmental is key to forming friendships with others. For me, the friendships I’ve formed with other Peace Corps Volunteers have made my Peace Corps experience bearable during the toughest times.

     Peace Corps life is not perfect, but really, what is? Even in the States there are struggles. As an older Volunteer, I am finding more room for growth. I let go of my ego and am building a new one. I like the person I am becoming. I like me. Age is only a number; doesn’t mean anything, unless you want it to.

 

update...

Finished a week and a half of in service training in Lusaka, then went on holiday to Malawi with some of my fellow Peace Corps friends. Pics to follow eventually. Snorkeled in Lake Malawi and cliff dived. Had a great adventure. I am still traveling back home to my village. May get there tomorrow. Africa is HUGE! Multiple 10+ hour bus rides on crowded buses with little food. Having fun regardless.

A girl I met on a beach of Lake Malawi.

The cliffs I jumped off of.

Village market headed toward Malawi.

Dugout canoes.

Mountains on our way to Malawi.

July in Mumena Village...

     Zambia is below the equator so the month of July is cool. In fact, temperatures can come close to freezing. July is also in the midst of dry season. Nothing is really green any more except for the trees that keep their leaves. 

     This month is also time of harvest. Maize is grown by most subsistence farmers. By now the corn in the fields is dry and the farmers harvest by hand. They will hire ox carts to transport the maize to their homes or to a place that stores maize. Once the maize is harvested and brought to its location, the maize cobs are either beaten with a club to remove the kernels or the kernels are removed by hand.

     I like this time of year. It is still warm during the day, guaranteed no rain, and it is breezy. I love seeing the elephant grass swaying in the wind. Peaceful. 

 

 

 Village children who visit all of the time

 

 

I don't give the children things. I don't want them to think I give handouts, but chalk is what I will give to the children. They practice writing on the cement slab of my outdoor kitchen

 

 

My to-do list

 

 

Transporting soil from old garden beds to create new beds in my garden in front of my house.

 

 

 I made this shelf which will serve as my workbench for my tree nursery. I built it into a tree.

 

 

 Children helped hold my bike while I loaded fired bricks from a kiln onto my bike for transport back to my house. I was able to fit six bricks on my bike.

 

 My brick patio. I added two more rows since this pic. I placed a layer of river stone underneath. Before rain season I will either have a shelter built to protect the bricks or cement over the bricks.

 

My walkway which I will fill in with gravel. I am looking outside my doorway.

 

 

Letting my hair grow. By the end of two years my hair should have grown a foot long!

 

This is my water source. It is about 50 meters away from my hut. I fill two 20 liter jerry cans two or three times per day and carry them to my hut. I don't mind doing this at all. I am learning how to conserve water.

More pics...

 Compound near my site

 Termite mounds that look like head stones and are almost as hard as a rocks. They are only found in a certain type of soil so they aren't found everywhere..

 Abandoned beehive by beekeeper and bees.

 Sankton cutting bamboo.

 Carrying the bamboo.

 Epiphyte: Plant that lives on another plant, but doesn't necessarily hurt its host. Thrilled to see these and looking forward to identifying.

 The first of three of my community maps I drew up at a community meeting.

 Nshima is eaten by some three times per day. It is made from ground corn mixed with water. The nshima is eaten with 'relish', or anything that accompanies it such as chicken, or in-season vegetables. It is eaten with the hands.

 Children eating nshima for breakfast.

Pesky chickens trying to get at the cornmeal.

Zam-definition II

Zam-line: while waiting in line at a store one must stand right behind the person in front of you, even breating down his or her neck or other people with think you aren't in line and will cut in front of you.

In Zambia people don't have the same sense of personal space as we do in the States. My first experience standing in line at a checkout I was standing about one foot behind the person in front of me. Well, a person cut in front of me without saying anything to me. I was amazed. I didn't say anything because I remembered it mentioned there is not a personal space bubble like what I'm used to back home. Now when I stand in line at the store I am almost touching the person in front of me.

Zam-definition I

Zam-tan: a msungu (white person) tan that appears to have a movie start tan until they take take off their kitenge (wrap) or trousers, tee-shirt, and Teva sandals and everything that's covered up is unsightly pale.

The word 'msungu' is used by Zambians meaning white person. It is not an offensive word even though it sounds like one.

A kitenge is a wrap worn as a full-length skirt worn by women. Zambians traditionally wear kitenges and the material comes in multiple designs. They can be very fashionable. Kitanges have over a hundred uses, such as a sling to carry their babies, a head wrap, towel, apron, a head cushion when women carry heavy loads on their heads, and a cloth to sit on the ground which is necessary because traditionally at gatherings men sit on stools or chairs while women sit on the ground or floor.

Not only do women in Zambia cover their legs and shoulders, but men cover their legs, too, with trousers. Men rarely expose their legs.

The word 'pants' is used when referring to underwear.

Zambians dress conservatively, though in the cities men and women tend to be more liberal with dress.

One of the things I appreciate about Zambian society is breastfeeding is socially accepted and it is common to see women breastfeed their babies in public.

It is offensive for women to expose armpit hair. If a woman doesn't shave her armpits she has to cover up.

                                                        Those aren't my feet, btw.

Community Entry...the beginning of my new life in Zambia

     I am in my second month of community entry and I am the only Peace Corps Volunteer in my village. Community entry in the Peace Corps is the first three months at site which allows Peace Corps Volunteers to settle into their home, become familiar with the surroundings and meet people in the community.

     My first two weeks of community entry were the most difficult because I felt like I had lost my identity. I didn't have my friends to help confirm who I am. I didn't have them there to laugh with, talk with or cry and complain with. I had to learn how to do this on my own. There really isn't anyone to turn to in those instances.

     I have become very strong over the past several weeks. But, I have also made some new friends and these new friends are from a different culture from my own. We eat different foods, have different worldviews and beliefs. Zambians have a difficult time comprehending divorce and how a woman can get by on her own. Also, they are perplexed with how I am able to live apart from my children. Zambians have very tights bonds not only with their immediate family, but with extended family members. They find it very odd that I only have two cousins and I have only met them once.

     But Zambians are accepting people. My host family has made it clear to me that I am a part of the family. And I really am. I feel very welcome going over to their house. I  go over almost every evening to eat dinner with them. I feel as though I have known these people all of my life. I come over and plop down on the couch and watch television with them. Yes, they have electricity which I don't have even though I only live about 100 meters away. But, anyway, I like this family and I am growing to love them.

     Once community entry ends I should be well integrated in the community. I will begin my work as a forestry extension agent helping the community members understand how they can improve their farming techniques and improve their lives in many different ways. I will work with people individually and I will hold workshops on malaria prevention and conservation farming. I will be available as a resource to help them acquire seed or obtaining fruit tree seedlings to plant at their homes to help with food security. I may also be able to help guide some of them on how to take on an income generating activity such as bee keeping.

     I hope to make some kind of difference in these people's lives. They already are making a difference in mine. I still have two years ahead of me for so much more exposure to a life that is so different from the one I've lived my whole life. I am very thankful for this experience.I am looking forward to see the kind of person I am yet to become.